Janine La Page asks: Should I be concerned that I’m not spending enough time with my two-year old son as a full-time working mom?
The short answer is no, not really. I know it sounds trite and cliché to say this, but it truly is about quality of time spent with your son, not quantity.
The definition of parenting is to worry about the well-being of your kids and by that standard, you are already an awesome parent! You’re not alone in this situation. Most mothers don’t have the luxury of quitting their jobs and staying home with their children. As long as you have reliable childcare for your son and are a warm, nurturing parent during the limited time you have with him, you’re already ahead of the game.
Children are very resilient, they require very little to grow into healthy and well-adjusted adults. You may like reading the good enough parenting checklist I’ve written previously, I think you’ll find that there’re really many things parents can do with and for their children that don’t require a full-time stay-at-home parenthood.
Plus, very soon, he will be off to school full-time and he and you will probably have the same “working” schedule, anyway.
On a personal, anecdotal note: my mom was what we used to call a homemaker in those days. Though my dad was burning the midnight oil in his business during most of my childhood and we kids barely saw him during the week, I am just as close with both parents, and my childhood is full of wonderful memories of time spent with him, reading together, discussing politics, or playing games. It’s funny how I remember him as always being there, though I know for a fact that he had a crazy-busy work schedule.
What do you think, dear reader? Should Janine be concerned?
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As mothers, we all make the best choices for our families. I would tell her that as long as her son seems happy – and she is happy – to stop worrying. She’s probably comparing her life to someone else’s, and that’s not a good thing to do.
Emily recently posted…remembering 31 days ago, and choosing to be more present today
Very good point about the comparison, Emily. There is no way we can win at the comparison game– there will always be other parents who do one or two things differently from us that have the potential to make us feel inadequate, just like there will always be one or two things we do differently from them that makes them feel the same way. Thanks for your feedback!